I am ready to share my story about my journey with anxiety, how it hits me and how I manage my anxiety. 

It all started during morning assembly one day last year, when suddenly I started to feel sweaty and hot, this was followed by a blasting in my eardrum, every small detail seemed to magnify, I didn’t know what was going on and my heart started to beat as if I was in extreme danger but it was just assembly like any other day.

It was a super scary experience for me and from that day on I started to have the same symptoms every day during assembly. I searched for help online (before I reached out to this wonderful platform) and found out about the flight or fight response. I realised that I fell under the fight response, I would resist and try to control my anxiety only to have it come back worse than before.

Fast forward to my exam day (D-day), it was all seemed to be going fairly smoothly as by this point I sort of figured out that I was suffering from anxiety but I didn’t really understand the full meaning behind it. I went into the exam and came out as if I was a turtle pushed back into my shell, I had experienced my first full blown panic attack. I can remember every detail of what happened fresh in my mind like it was just yesterday.

It’s fair to say, I did not do too well in the exam, so I retook the exam this year.

A lot has changed and all I can say is during my exam this year, I experienced peace but of course also slight (normal) anxiety. I have never been so calm during an exam. Even before and throughout the year things have been so different. Nowadays I enjoy assembly instead of focusing on myself panicking.

For this I definitely have to thank meditation as well as having a counsellor that listens well to me, she taught me how to relax my body and explained how much meditation and mindfulness would help.

When I first tried out meditation, I was hesitant because each time I took a deep breath it would feel so forced and a bit strange . I often associate deep breathing with anger, so it was something I had to work hard on. It was only after practise and when I eventually did it right that it worked wonders for me.

And of course I have to thank the No Panic organisation for always sharing these amazing quotes and words of encouragement to me. Knowing there are people on hand that understand me and are there to support and advise at all times is so comforting… S