By Brian Robinson, helpline volunteer.
Many of us see anxiety as this terrible enemy or bully who we have to stand up against and fight. Who would blame us for that? However, the problem with this view of things is we risk ending up at war with ourselves.
Fight or flight is in fact a system which exists in all of us and its only purpose is to keep us safe. It is part of who we are. It is not our enemy: and therefore it should be seen more as a misguided friend.
When anxiety strikes we brace ourselves, plant our feet, clench or fists ready for the fight. This is the worst thing we could do. This only produces physical tension and sends a ‘danger present’ signal to our nervous system. Yes, it is the most natural reaction to resist: but passive resistance is the best way to encourage things to settle.
When panic comes knocking, allow it in, don’t push it away, talk to it, reassure it that everything is okay and we are not in danger. Meet it with patience and understanding.
I’m not going to pretend it’s the best friend in the world; or that it won’t test our patience to the limits; but it is a friendship that needs to be worked on: slamming the door in its face won’t make it go away.
